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Writer's pictureEvolveMe

A Midlife Memoir of Self-Hope

Updated: Aug 6


Photo credit Kate Sweeney


At EvolveMe, we’re on a mission to support women in midlife career transition. And what better way than sharing stories of those who’ve made it to the other side? As we like to say, “If you can’t see it, you can’t be it!”


We’re thrilled to interview Sarah Gormley, the author of a new memoir, The Order of Things. In her latest career chapter, she’s embracing her role as an art gallery owner in Columbus, Ohio.


There are so many gems of wisdom in this beautiful book! We know you’ll identify with the twists and turns along her career reinvention journey and the paths that led her back to herself.


Sarah's memoir is a gift. Her voice is raw, honest, and poignantly vulnerable, offering a glimpse into a story that will touch the hearts of women everywhere. We're so grateful this book exists in the world.


What we loved about The Order of Things was how open Sarah was about wanting more and how she didn’t let the voices of others – or those in her head – win out.


EvolveMe: After reading The Order of Things, we feel like we know you! Thank you for such an intimate and heartfelt read. Your story hits close to home for us fellow recovering perfectionists, career pivoters, emerging entrepreneurs, and corporate escapees who've charted new courses.


Your journey from "gold star" collector to joy seeker is inspiring. Has your definition of success shifted, or perhaps found a way to encompass both achievement and fulfillment?


Sarah: That’s a great question and one I think about pretty regularly. It’s really a matter of  what “healthy success” looks like - and feels like - which is very personal. Said differently, maybe it’s more about wanting to be successful in more meaningful pursuits than titles and salaries. 


Objectively, I had a fairly successful career, but it wasn’t fulfilling because I didn’t believe in myself enough to even ask what I really wanted and figure out how to get the help I needed. Now, I’m lucky to be able to focus my energy on more creative endeavors at the gallery and with the book. Neither is super lucrative YET, but I’m having the best time and still pinch myself that I get to do what I do every day. 


EvolveMe:  We’ve heard you say that The Order of Things is a “self-hope” book rather than a “self-help” book. What do you mean by this?


Sarah: Because I’m not a therapist or a life coach, I wanted to make sure that people know that the story isn’t a prescriptive one. My intent wasn’t to tell people what to do. Instead, I wanted to show readers what the change in my life looked like. 


The Order of Things is simply a story about what happened and how I’ve come to make sense of how and why these things happened. Of course, I am thrilled when readers find the book helpful, but it's not an instruction manual or guidebook. What helped me learn to experience life in a new way may not be the path for everyone, but I love the idea of hope that real change is possible - especially when we need it most. 


EvolveMe: These lines in your memoir stopped us in our tracks: "When you create a version of yourself and that version becomes who you are, how and when do you ever figure out who you are meant to be?" 


So many women in their 40s, 50s, and beyond come to us believing in outdated or limiting versions of themselves. What helped you arrive at who you are today - who you are “meant to be”? And can you give your #1 tip for women trying to do the same in midlife?


Honestly, what helped me is therapy. I hear over and over again how many women are filled with self-doubt, imposter syndrome and, in my case, what was pretty severe self-loathing, and it makes me incredibly sad that so many of us have lived this way for so long when it’s just not necessary.


But I needed to understand what was going on in my head and heart before I could even begin to understand how to show up differently in the world. That may sound woo-woo (and I’m not an especially woo-woo person), but I know I wouldn’t have uncovered this healthier version of myself without therapy. For some women, help may come from a book, a life coach, or a conference with EvolveMe. 


Regardless of where we find help, I now believe that real change starts with the hard conversations about what’s going on inside of us. Taking an honest look at yourself can be terrifying, but it gets easier, I promise! 


When you create a version of yourself and that version becomes who you are, how and when do you ever figure out who you are meant to be? 

EvolveMe: Beyond escaping the world of PowerPoint (you deserve a “gold star” for that one!), how has reinventing yourself as a gallery owner and author impacted you on a personal level? What has been the most rewarding aspect of this new path?


One word: flexibility. As an entrepreneur, I’m never not thinking about the gallery or how to drive sales, or what I could do differently for my artists (who are the best), BUT: I decide how to spend my days, what meetings to take, and frankly, when I need to take a nap. That flexibility makes me entirely responsible and accountable for what activities deserve and get my energy. 


No more double-booked time slots, no more back-to-back meetings that always run over. No more showing up late to dinners with friends or loved ones because of this crisis or that emergency call created by somebody else. Of course, there’s still stuff that goes awry that I can’t predict or control - and being an entrepreneur has so many challenges - but the flexibility and time to focus on what really matters, like connecting buyers with art they love and writing a few good lines is highly rewarding.


EvolveMe: A common thread in our work is that even the most talented and accomplished women come to us lacking clarity and confidence when facing change. They feel stuck.


What helped you transition from your corporate marketing role where you worked with high-profile companies like Martha Stewart, IMAX, Girl Scouts of the USA, and Adobe, to more creative pursuits? Where did you summon the courage?  


I wish I could say it was courage - the truth is I was about to have some type of major breakdown, and right at the same time, we got the diagnosis about my mom’s cancer coming back. That news was a catalyzing moment about what really mattered to me. I wanted to be home at the farm with her and decided that regardless of what happened with her, I had to take a year off of work to clear my head and reset. 


I love the word “recalibrate” because that’s what it felt like: I took a look at my life and made the adjustments that added up to this new version of life that includes an art gallery, writing, capital-L LOVE and living in Ohio. And again, none of this happened overnight. The five years of hard work in therapy before I moved home enabled me to see myself in a new way, which is what truly made these changes possible. 


EvolveMe: What’s your best advice for women who want a next chapter – whether they’re returning to work after a break for caregiving or pivoting careers – you did both!


Be kind to yourself and ask for help. If you do these two things more consistently, the world opens up to you in new ways. And the first part is waaaaaaay harder than the second part. 


It’s not just booking the massage and going for walks in the woods. Yes, do those self-care things, but by “being kind,” I really mean shutting off the negative voice in your head, that faucet of negativity that can run all day, every day even if just a trickle. Do whatever it takes to figure out how to truly be kind - at least KINDER - to yourself and watch what starts happening.


EvolveMe: Ok – we have to ask you two last things. Give us a sneak peek.


What can we expect from you next? Will you be taking your memoir on the road?


Yes!The Order of Things is going on the road for sure! I have several big events planned, with more being added as we look out past publication day. The best place to find all of the book scoop is www.sarahgormley.com, and I’m always yammering away on Instagram @scgormley. I also have an idea for a second book called “Thursday” but haven’t even said that publicly, so here I am, manifesting. Now, who sounds all woo-woo?!


EvolveMe: We love your Martha-Stewart-Fired-Me Cookies recipe. What’s your drink of choice to pair them with? 


I’m going to go with champagne, because every bite of one of those cookies tastes like a little celebration!

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